Tag Archives: overwhelmed
BLAH! I’m so damn fed up right now. Stress and anxiety is through the roof. There is no amount of meditation that can help me now, so I will take to writing as that tends to calm me and result in good revelations. I want to wake up and go to bed worrying about my children and my family…not the condo association deactivating our paying tenants access to the building in the middle of the night. I don’t want to be fearful of a court hearing threatened against us for something we did not do. I don’t want to worry about a leak at the condo we are trying to sell, that does not actually exist. I don’t want to have to drive an hour (without traffic, if that’s even possible) to address a burglary that was actually the fire department breaking down our door and […]
I am alone. I don’t actually remember the last time I was alone… It has been well over a year, that I know for sure, as that was when Lili was conceived. Ever since then, I have always been with someone else whether it be Lili, family, friends, husband, dogs, etc. Tonight it is just me. Lili is asleep for the night. Alec is out with friends. Even my dogs are away at my parent’s house. I woke up this morning feeling very overwhelmed, as I have felt lately. I have an endless compulsion to do everything for everyone flawlessly. This is an admirable quality, but an exhausting one. On a typical day I wake up, (possibly work out) feed and interact with Lili, work, listen to some lectures or read journal articles, clean, repeat. In the evening I try to make dinner for my husband, and then once Lili […]